the pursuit of quiet

"In the midst of information overload, the ability to find stillness within is the true superpower." - Eckhart Tolle

"The pursuit of quietude is not a withdrawal from the world but a deeper immersion into one's own being." - Albert Schweitzer

The start of the New Year, occurring immediately after the bustling Christmas season - a time that's both exhilarating and hectic for me - often instills a yearning for a quieter and more mindful way of life. It prompts thinking about the constant struggle with Noise - the kind with a capital letter - an unfortunate and fundamental trait of our modern lives. Noise that contains the cacophony of myriad growing inner and outer 'sounds'.

Noise comes in many forms.

First, it's a chatter in my head, sort of like listening at the same time to a rock concert, an audio book, news, a neighbor's gossip, a barking dog, a boss's commands, number four on to-do list... Random fragments, notes, words, echos. Insane overwhelm. No wonder we have such hard time to connect with ourselves in here and now.We can barely hear ourselves. No wonder that our anxiety sky-rockets as we are struggling with overthinking and fragmented data which pushes our brain to the limits. We desperately try to make sense of those over-spilling and never-shutting up thoughts.

Then there's the incessant din of external Noise — the clamor of work, the hustle of the streets, the chaos of shopping centers, the persistent beeping from our phones, the overlapping voices, the multitude of screens, the school run rush, the bustling subway. The list can easily go on. For me, it's the digital storm that's the worst. It can make it seem as if we're perpetually residing in the midst of Westfield Shopping Centre in Stratford, one of the busiest and largest shopping centers in the UK. (A mere 10 minutes there leaves me feeling overwhelmed, almost in a physical pain).

And the third Noise is perhaps the worst and most enigmatic. Some call it the 'inner critic' or 'judge'. It might be small, yet very effective voice scrutinizing our every move. Always pointing at failures and places where we are coming short. Whispering that we are not good enough, we are not doing enough, not trying enough. There can be lots of 'not enoughs'. And that whisper can feel like a scream. This tyrannical Noise is often well established and owns us in a dysfunctional way.

Some noises are good and joyful and necessary. Some are like unwelcome guests that are hard to get rid of. Others like an uncontrollable force that we sold ourselves to. And the biggest problem of all - TOO MUCH NOISE and not enough time and space to deal with it.

TOO MUCH NOISE SYNDROME:

• stops us from truly listening and hearing, from taking time to respond mindfully and not impulsively or mindlessly

• is a barrier to connecting with ourselves

• robs us from peace, health, truth, satisfaction... (you name it)

• stops us from simply being, seeing and appreciating what is around

• makes it so much harder to switch off when we need it

• increases anxiety

• reduces concentration

No amount of ruminating over past or future will change the fact that we are confined to the present moment. With only two ears and a singular brain, our body, our self demands boundaries. It requires frequent 'quiet'.

Be careful what noise you let in. Don't let it become Noise. And if you battle Noise, be smart and ruthless. Noise is addictive and seducing. It won't go easily and with half-heartened steps. Re-claim silence. Make pursuit of quiet your new self resolution. You will be surprised what you will be able to hear.

The lyrics from a song in the Matilda musical beautifully capture my idea and my need of quiet.

'Quiet...

Like silence, but not really silent...

Just that still sort of quiet

Like the sound of a page being turned in a book,

Or a pause in a walk in the woods.

Quiet...

Like silence, but not really silent...

Just that nice kind of quiet,

Like the sound when you lie upside down in your bed.

Just the sound of your heart in your head...

And though the people around me,

Their mouths are still moving,

The words they are forming

Cannot reach me anymore.

And it is quiet...

And I am warm...

Like I've sailed

Into the eye of the storm...'

('Quiet', Matilda the Muscial)